(no subject)

[sythyry]

Victory! [16 Oix 4261]

Yay!

I got Ilottat back!

I orrenned over to his apartment, and we had a very long and squirmy-uncomfortable talk, and I made a few promises, and ...

We're back together!

And yes, makeup sex is quite yummy.

The Promises

1. I won't use words like "traff" or "transaffectionate" to or about him.
2. I won't go to Across Saga any more.
3. I'll do Flooosh's trick of establishing my Orren alternate identity as a publicly-acceptable mistress that Ilottat can be seen in public with.
4. Ilottat will go out in public with me sometimes.
5. I'll ... um ... never mind exactly what. Whenever Ilottat asks. But he won't ask when I'm too tired or too full or something.
6. I'll stop calling myself traff so much and won't be political about it.
7. I won't be looking for any more lovers.
8. He'll try to be nicer to me, even when I look like a Zi Ri and we're in public.

I figure I'll go to Across Saga in Rassimel shape and that won't disturb him. After all, if my Orren identity is suitably non-traff for him to be seen in public with, my Rassimel identity will be suitably non-me to satisfy anyone.

The Pornography

He didn't mention the pornography. Or the clothes, but he might not have remembered those or maybe he thinks they just vanished. [As when a creation spell expires. -bb] I'm not sure what I should do.

[Poll #613242]

Comments

[ladyperegrine.livejournal.com]

*hugs*

Seems like a lot of promises to me.

Ask yourself if you're happy with this arrangement. If you are, then it doesn't matter what we think. ;-)

[sythyry.livejournal.com]

Oh, I'm happy enough about the parts that Ilottat will see! Not so worried about the other parts.

[terrycloth.livejournal.com]

It really boils down to:
(a) Sythyry won't be publically traff.
(1) Ilottat will associate with Sythyry in public.

(b) Sythyry'll make zir orren form somewhat more solidified.
(2) Ilottat will have 'her' as a real mistress.

(c) Sythyry won't sleep around.
(3) Presumably, Ilottat is already not sleeping around.

Which is almost fair. (a) is a prerequisite for (1), (b) is a prerequisite for (2), and (c) is a normal realtionship thing.

There's other stuff, but zie has no intention of following through on them, so it doesn't matter.

...

I give it a week.

[yotogi.livejournal.com]

I wish I could disagree with you, but... this logic (and historical precedent) is unassailable.

[ladyperegrine.livejournal.com]

You're good! Thanks for the explanation. :-)

A week? I give it a month, give or take.

[collie13.livejournal.com]

Mm... okay, I'll bet on 2 weeks, how's that? ;)

Re the porn, keep it. It'll make a nice gift for later, Sythyry, should Illotat actually keep up his end of the deal. Er... no pun intended, sorry.

[spotweld.livejournal.com]

Perhaps a few discreet inquires (and some even more discreet lozens) to the Academy's librarians will locate a nice set of closed stacks where the contents of the suitcase could be safely stored but occasionally referenced. (Though you may want to take extra steps to ensure it stays out of the Vae's possesion.)

[terrycloth.livejournal.com]

Yes! Give it to Vae! Why wasn't that one of the options?

[chipuni.livejournal.com]

Well, Vae is a very strange Orren, isn't she?

[redbird]

You may want to bear in mind that your boyfriend is training as a diplomat/spy. Don't assume that he won't know you're going to Across Saga because you go as a Rassimel--he knows you have Cloak of Another God, after all.

[sythyry.livejournal.com]

[Bard smirks.]

[brynndragon.livejournal.com]

Actually, I suspect it doesn't matter if he figures it out as long as no one else figures it out. This being part of the "don't be publicly traff" thing, because he already knows that S is traff(?).

[kistaro]

O Zi Ri, it rarely bodes well for any attempt to recover a relationship when the first (or second, or third, or any vaguely close N^th) thing you do is to try to figure out a way around the agreements you made... such as shapeshifting your way into Across Saga. If your relationship with him is such that you still feel compelled to head there, despite being in this hypothetically steady arrangement, is it really a good idea to continue things when he's made it clear that he wants monogamy?

I'm all in support of polyamory, myself, but that's beside the point- if you're going to have to go out of your way to keep secrets from your lover, something's gone rather wrong. What is it that makes you feel you must regularly return to Across Saga, even wearing the mask of a Rassimel? [[OOC- Pun intended. Bard, will the pun translate?]]

[sythyry.livejournal.com]

I'm not sleeping with anyone but him! I'm just going to a cafe and sharing snacks with friends!

[The pun goes backwards. 'mask' in Ketherian is a derivative of the word for a Rassimel coloration.]

[redbird]

You, and we, know that you are just sharing snacks with friends.

Ilottat seems to be uncomfortable with your doing so, either because he doesn't believe other people could resist your charms, or for some other reason to do with the place itself.

The difficulty isn't that you told him you wouldn't have other lovers--it's that you told him you wouldn't go to Across Saga. Even if you neither flirt with nor touch anyone else there, he's likely to be angry if he finds out you set foot in the place.

[sythyry.livejournal.com]

How could he find out? He doesn't talk to traff people!

[spotweld.livejournal.com]

He doesn't, but who ever he is when he's not being himself... might.

[collie13.livejournal.com]

Um, I believe it was you yourself, dear Zi Ri, who pointed out everyone knows you go there -- and not all of them can be traff, so at least some of them may be suitable conversational companions for your Orren lover. Plus, you have shown a charming inclination to guiltily unburden yourself by blurting out all your secrets to Illotat when you're trying to make up with him. ;)

[yotogi.livejournal.com]

Well, yes, but that's somewhat beside the point that said Orren is having minor conniptions at the mere mention of the place, snacks notwithstanding.

[mazlynn.livejournal.com]

My suggestion for what to do with the pornography. Keep it. Return to Ilottat any bits of it which are specifically *Sythyry* pornography. (I seem to remember mention of a portrait session....) Explain to him that since he is Not Traff, and is only interested in you, you understand that the pictures of other zi-ri would be meaningless to him and will therefore take them off of his hands. However, since you are now, at least publically, Not Traff as well, it only makes sense for you to have an extensive collection of same species pornography.

[lysana.livejournal.com]

I think this is a very cunning and sensible plan.

[collie13.livejournal.com]

Ooh, very clever! ;)

[sythyry.livejournal.com]

[Bard smirks a lot.]

[cktraveler.livejournal.com]

That is amazingly clever. (And why is there no option for "post it here"?)

[zeeth_kyrah]

If he doesn't ask about it, then don't tell him you have it (but he probably knows by now). It's up to him to want it - and while not everyone has to know, frankly, if he has that kind of material in his possession it indicates an interest that Just Being Polite About won't cover sufficiently. And that's really his problem; you don't become not-traff by not talking about it.

[xyzzysqrl]

Aw, and here I was set to congratulate you on doing the right thing.

[sythyry.livejournal.com]

I am doing the right thing!

[Zie thinks...]

[esory.livejournal.com]

Well, I can't say I'm surprised that you got back together. I am sorry that you promised not to go to Across Saga, though.

[sythyry.livejournal.com]

I'll be there, promise or no promise!
...
Do you ever go there?

[rowyn]

You know, that was quite a simple question. I wonder why Esory never answered it?