Addendum ... Scorecard for Monsters, part 2

[sythyry]

I am a hermaphrodite. Not a male, not a female, not a co-lover, and definitely not a both-female. A hermaphrodite.

If you want to use one of the other genders, try female. I'm wearing Orren-girl shape a lot these days. And I've got a boyfriend. He's male -- I checked. Supposedly male Orrens tend to prefer female Orrens above all others, though mine rather wilts at the thought. Anyways, if you've got to pretend I'm some incorrect gender, pick female, if you would be so kind.

And please stop asking about my intimate anatomy. Consult a standard reference work if you must know. Or some Zi Ri pornography. I can provide you a bibliography of Zi Ri pornography -- I know where Ilottat keeps his stash.

[OOC -- Sorry! Sythyry's a little edgy just now. -bb]

Comments

[melskunk.livejournal.com]

I'm sorry about monsters. We wouldn't generally ask each OTHER about our intimate anatomy, so I don't know why it's considered polite to do so with you <:)

[sythyry.livejournal.com]

Something about chatting with people from another universe, I suppose...

[kistaro]

Probably a reasonable conclusion. You are, after all, the only source we have for such information, irrelevant (to us) and invasive (to you) it may be! Although a bibliography would be interesting, it is hardly useful to those in a universe that, tragically, lacks Zi Ri pornography. Not to say that there does not exist pornography of creatures that do not exist in this universe (or at least in local space), as rendered by extremely creative and, all things considered, relatively popular artists, but alas, none of Zi Ri.

Considering that you are conversing with members of a species that has a tendency to create pornography of other species, within such an uncivilized context the excessive interrogation may be, perhaps, more understandable?

[sythyry.livejournal.com]

[OOC: Hmph! beetiger and I have been working tirelessly to bring you a great deal of information about the World Tree and its inhabitants! OK, not pornography. -bb]

You, sir, need a far better inter-library loan system.

Though, come to think of it, I haven't tried ordering pornography through ours.

[greenreaper.livejournal.com]

You know, you probably could charge $7.12 a month for World Tree porn . . . *grins, ducks and runs*

[sythyry.livejournal.com]

Y'know, it has been suggested that I write a private, subscribers-only adult thread of Sythyry.

[greenreaper.livejournal.com]

It's an idea. It doesn't sound like you'd enjoy it that much, though, given your comment about inspiration in the previous post. I'd be far less surprised to see something like a comedic enactment of "The Khtsoyis and I" on sythery :-)

[sythyry.livejournal.com]

I don't think I'd enjoy it, no.

[lunarennui.livejournal.com]

poor sythyry! your gender seems quite clear to me (as zi ri, not female or male or actually even quite hermaphrodite). it must be very frustrating to have people constantly make assumptions about your gender!

as for your ~mother~, well, most parents have issues with the choices their offspring makes regarding sexual playmates. i wouldn't be surprised if zie hadn't had an affair or two of zir own with other species! there certainly isn't anything WRONG with being traff--you'll just have to wait until society catches up and learns that bodyplay is bodyplay, regardless of the species involved. (of course, that may take quite some time, but horrible accidents barred, you'll live that long anyway.)

[collie13.livejournal.com]

*another stifled giggle* Dear Zi Ri, don't you think Illotat might be the one a bit embarrassed this time around, if you raided his stash of Zi Ri pornography for a bibliography for monsters to review? ;)

[sythyry.livejournal.com]

Oh, dearie.

[mmsword.livejournal.com]

Kind of odd to think of Zi Ri pornorgraphy, more in a social sense. I wouldn't think there would be many Zi Ri at all interested in doing that sort of thing. Though I suppose 'Cloak of Another God' is a common spell to find in the pornography industry.

[sythyry.livejournal.com]

There's not a lot, and I don't know that Zi Ri are the main customers.

[gavinfox.livejournal.com]

*Frowns*

ALRIGHT, I said I was sorry. I dont *HAVE* any anatomical references on zi ri, and hermaphrodites are really rare on this planet in anything other than fish, and I also dont have any zi ri pornography! If I did, I wouldnt be asking you to explain how things work!

Now. On this world, there seem to be two type of hermaphrodites in animals that actually work this way. Let me quote a description, and you MIGHT be able to clarify at least SOMETHING for me....

"Hermaphrodites are divided into two main categories: synchronous hermaphrodites, and sequential hermaphrodites. In the synchronous hermaphrodites, organisms possess both active male and active female reproductive organs at the same time. In sequential hermaphrodites, both male and female reproductive organs may be present, but only one is active and viable at any given time."

Which is the case in Zi Ri? Or something different? Or is this too much to ask?

Sorry, but I'm a bit snappy too!

[chipuni.livejournal.com]

Gavin,
Please respect Sythyry's request. Let it drop.
-- Chip

[gavinfox.livejournal.com]

[guys, I talk with bard on AIM all the time, and we are friends, and I'm just providing an antagonistic monster viewpoint for Sythyry to sound off against. And, of course, using the darker side of my personality and curiosity as a way of coming up with topics that push sythyry's buttons. Remember, we're both having fun doing this, and it does show off parts of sythyry's personality that you might not otherwise see...]

[vernononfm.livejournal.com]

[ OOC Perhaps this is true. And, perhaps this is how our characters would react to your questions and actions. If you can RP, then so can we. In fact, my posts are entirely IC, and thus it /is/ how my character reacts.]

[vernononfm.livejournal.com]

*sighs* You monsters... Not everything here is going to be something you can understand. Sometimes you just have to accept this and get on with life, instead of sitting, fretting, and bothering decent primes about the specifics of their reproductive anatomy. Perhaps you should sit down and think about how much effort you are giving to making our universe as real to you as your own is. Us? We don't really care what your universe is like, and are quite happy with our own, and have enough of our lives to worry about without worrying about yours as well. I suggest calming down, and accepting things for how they are: Different.

I have tried to be civil about this and your other requests, but it seems you are going to great lengths to bother Sythyry about our world, and trying to make it into your own. We don't want it that way. It's fine the way it is. (Well, a few monsters we could do without, but we manage..) Please, remember we are not you, and what we know and understand may not be things you can, as there are many things you take for granted that we could never grasp. Just accept it, and use that to /enjoy/ the wonderful (and often funny) stories Sythyry chooses to share.

[sythyry.livejournal.com]

Oh!

Where do you live?

[greenreaper.livejournal.com]

A waterfront property with lots of beautiful young females, naturally! He dragged me there to visit just a few days ago, although I didn't get to see much of it as I was up to my arms in trouble at the time . . .

[greenreaper.livejournal.com]

(and before you ask - no, it's not in a city; no doorwaying was involved!)

[vernononfm.livejournal.com]

*grins* That's a very good question! An even better one is:
Would you use this information to visit me for fun and pleasure, or would you use it to find me and keep the information you share here from becoming public knowledge? Not that I would. If I were to make it public, you would stop writing, and thus I'd not have such enticing stories to read! So, your secrets are quite safe with me. :)

[gavinfox.livejournal.com]

[see my post about role-playing an antagonistic viewpoint, that bard is in on this, and that we are both enjoying this interaction....]

[sythyry.livejournal.com]

hermaphrodites are really rare on this planet in anything other than fish,

Then discuss the matter with a fish.

Which is the case in Zi Ri?

I have neither male nor female parts at any time, pace Cloak of Another God.

Or is this too much to ask?

Why, yes. Yes it is.

[redbird]

sythyry specifically asked "And please stop asking about my intimate anatomy."

That seems fairly clear.

A proper apology does not consist of "Alright, I said I was sorry" followed immediately by repeating what one is apologizing for.

[sythyry.livejournal.com]

A quite cogent point, which I was too nervous to realize!

Enough procrastinating, alas. I must now fly to the Halflight Gate.

[yotogi.livejournal.com]

Some of the terrible angels have a lot of free time on our hands (all of them) this week. We could help you solve this problem with rudeness... maybe give the offending parties a little tour of "Here?"

[gavinfox.livejournal.com]

[like I said earlier, see my post about these questions being role-play...]

[lysana.livejournal.com]

[Your character is being reacted to as you should expect zie to be when zir's being a pushy twit. Deal or stop playing; your choice.]

[gavinfox.livejournal.com]

[*grins evilly*]

[sythyry.livejournal.com]

[OOC: Though cutting back on the twittishness might not be a poor choice.]

[gavinfox.livejournal.com]

[I know... I'll make an effort for it... problem is, there's a fair amount of twittishness in my REAL personality..]

[vernononfm.livejournal.com]

[OOC My point exactly!] *sponts RU CO spell to change Gavin's evil grin to a frown*

[greenreaper.livejournal.com]

I guess metaphors like "turn that frown upside-down!" would not be a good idea in a world where someone might indeed choose to do so. :-)

[cowboy-r.livejournal.com]

Frankly, speaking for the Monsters who aren't obsessed, I'd just as soon you kept the details of your genitalia to yourself, thank you very little.

[shizouka.livejournal.com]

Meep? *offers a Pup-tart*

[sythyry.livejournal.com]

[OOC - a very enthusiastic puppy-fox has been asking a great many questions of Sythyry, some of them a bit more intimate than Sythyry likes. And people occasionally use 'he' to refer to zir. And, um, I think zie likes to stir up trouble sometimes. -bb]

[gavinfox.livejournal.com]

[it's a fox kit! young foxes are kits! and bard and I are in on this...]

[shizouka.livejournal.com]

Well, then many happy hugs and hopes that everyone can assimilate a common friendly viewpoint.

[redbird]

These are entirely reasonable requests, and it's not as though you haven't provided us with suitable pronouns to use.

I suspect that the people who are referring to you as "he" are doing so because the tendency among English-speakers (English being the language that your translator is using) is to default to masculine when gender is unknown.

[sythyry.livejournal.com]

Then English-speakers should get themselves a boyfriend! The gender may be unknown, but it is not horrible.

Well, at least it isn't on an Orren.

[gavinfox.livejournal.com]

...I'm not sure if you were joking, but what we mean is, we use the masculine pronouns in more cases than simply referring to someone of the male sex and gender...

[collie13.livejournal.com]

Then English-speakers should get themselves a boyfriend!

*splnroonkpftthhpt*!!
(which is the sound a monster with relatively good self-control makes when she manages only barely to restrain herself and NOT splort her drink all over her screen while reading Sythyry!! ;-D )

[sythyry.livejournal.com]

Never drink while reading Sythyry!

[collie13.livejournal.com]

LOL! Curiosity compells me to ask -- will you be sharing this important safety tip for monsters with Vae any time soon? ;)

[sythyry.livejournal.com]

Keeping Vae from choking is not one of my new duties!

[collie13.livejournal.com]

Heh, and think of the report it would engender:

"Dangerous nendrai subject defeated, sir!"

"Really?! HOW?!"

"Umm... would you believe... the Zi Ri knew a killer joke?"

[collie13.livejournal.com]

[[Oh! That reminds me, Bard -- did the email arrive safely? ;) ]]

[justicezero.livejournal.com]

Right. Well, not always. Properly, in the language the translator is using, entities of undefined gender use the male pronouns.. however, many whom I know, and myself, have adopted the use of the plural pronouns, used as singular, in such a case, and some authorities on the language have adopted such as proper, though as of yet it remains controversial at best. (they, they, their, them, theirs, themself) I assure you that if I should use one of these to refer to you at some point that I am not mistaking you for a chromadon.