(no subject)

[sythyry]

Keeping Faith with Ilottat [18 Oix 4261]

Yesterday I managed to avoid indulging myself with over two hundred Orren. Perhaps as many as three hundred. Ilottat should be happy, shouldn't he?

In case that sounds a bit evasive, here's what I did do that he might object to:

1. I sat on Zanniajaia's shoulder in Dissection of Spells yesterday. I couldn't help it -- Prof. Gostegg was doing a demonstration of some very small space distortion spells, and I needed to be able to see. [Thanks, melskunk]

So of course Ilottat and I got into a fight about that.

Ilottat:"You should have faite de la levitation, levitated!"

Me:"Prof. Gostegg doesn't want active magic in class. It makes everything harder to see. I don't even wear feathers."

Ilottat:this objection! and that objection!

Me:"I'm not interested in Zanniajaia!"

Ilottat:"What if I were to baiser, kiss, her?"

Me:[drools helplessly]

Ilottat:"So you are, in fact, interested in her."

Me:"I'm interested in seeing you kissing anyOrren!"

Ilottat:"I do believe we agreed not to discuss this matiere, topic, any further." He looked all very superior.

When your boyfriend makes you agree not to do something, and then twists the conversation so that you're doing it, is he trying to break up or something?

Comments

[haikujaguar.livejournal.com]

I continue not to like Ilottat. I suspect you should break up with him before he manages to weasel his way into breaking up with you. You know, just so you can have the emotional high ground....

Give the relationship a clean death, for Heaven's sake. :P

[nixve.livejournal.com]

When your boyfriend makes you agree not to do something, and then twists the conversation so that you're doing it, is he trying to break up or something?

Well, he's trying to manipulate you into doing everything he wants with no regard for what you want. Which, I guess, means that he is inadvertantly giving you the perfect reason to break up with him.

I second haikujaguar, this relationship needs a clean death. You need to show Ilottat that if he wants to be loved (by you especially) he needs to show that he is deserving of that love.

[brynndragon.livejournal.com]

Yes, I agree with nixve. He is being, in the vernacular of my nation, a selfish prick. You can either become what he wants you to be (at which point he'll get bored with you and dump you), or continue to be yourself (and eventually he'll find an excuse to dump you for not being his obedient little sex slave). Just dump him first, it'll hurt less. If he wants someone who will act with Orren sensibilities, he can bloody well get himself an Orren.

[vernononfm.livejournal.com]

Ilottat doesn't want someone with Orren sensibilities. If that were true, then he would not object to Zir having another lover, as most Orren I know have another. And, speaking as an Orren, that's still considered faithful! No, I suspect he wants to have Sythyry all to himself, partly out of jealousy and partly out of fear that should this relationship be 'discovered', he will be disowned, loose his title, and be reduced to a commoner. (Like it's bad to be normal, or something! :P)

Though, what he is doing is (at least in my city-state) perfectly acceptable diplomacy. Manipulation is often used to broker deals here. But, as Zie isn't a diplomat, in addition to being a lover, this is not at all a fair tactic. Perhaps, though highly unlikely, he is unaware of the gross misconduct it is, and is thus innocent?

[brynndragon.livejournal.com]

I do not like the use of the word "innocent" there. It seems as if he is to be absolved of responsibility for his hurtful actions through ignorance of their effects. Although I do feel a touch sorry for him, that he might lose out simply through his inability to balance work and play.

Hey Sy, whatever happened to his Zi-Ri porn?

[heavenscalyx.livejournal.com]

Thirded on the clean death. He's using everything he can against you. Demanding monogamy when he himself is not monogamous (since it's all by definition adultery) is really frigging hypocritical. The games he's playing are borderline emotional abuse.

Let him find another Zi Ri to play with. And if he can't, well that's tough biscuits for him, isn't it?

[sianmink.livejournal.com]

You certainly have a strong bargaining position if, for some strange reason, you wish to stay with Ilottat. there just aren't many Zi-Ri available for him to be not-traff with, while you have the choice of many, many orren to be very traff with. Seems to me he can't be too demanding if he wants to continue practicing his fetish!

[terrycloth.livejournal.com]

You should definately start practicing your sleethly ways (as Tillisa put it) on him right back. It's probably what he wants, anyway -- he doesn't think any less of Ysgwyd for the way she does it to him, does he?

[redbird]

He may or may not be trying to break up.

He is certainly trying to "win" arguments and put himself in a position of superiority over you, rather than actually trying to resolve problems.

[sythyry.livejournal.com]

[Bard blinks. "Hah, you're right. I was wondering what he was up to." -bb]

[cowboy-r.livejournal.com]

I'm a member of a species known as "Curmudgeon," and we're known for being not romantically attached. So this comment should be taken with the requisite flavoring spices:

I'd buy or make him a boxed "cloak of another god" for ZiRi, and give it to him as a breaking-up present. He can hire a prostitute to be a ZiRi, and since he'd be paying zir, zie'd have to put up with his crapola.

You, on the other hand, do not.

[chipuni.livejournal.com]

You are very, very kind, and you have the best idea that I've seen so far.

[lysana.livejournal.com]

I love this idea.

[tuftears.livejournal.com]

Such the cute picture!

So what does Illotat have that Zanniajaia doesn't? Besides a wife. };)

[yotogi.livejournal.com]

He may not be actively trying to break up but he's doing a fantastic job of heading down that road any-old-way by being such a dork constantly.

[justicezero.livejournal.com]

He is a fool, and one in no position to be making such demands. I suggest you collect your personal sovereignty and refuse to be manipulated in such a way. You will do precisely what you want, you will tell him that you are doing so, and he has no complaint coming, as the supply of Zi Ri is far, far more limited than the supply of adventurous Orren. If he wishes you to bestow your attentions upon him, he can damned well give the respect due such a demand.

[(Anonymous)]

If you really cared for him, you'd let him go. He's too good for you and he deserves better from anyone who might claim to be his beloved.

[yotogi.livejournal.com]

This tactic didn't work the last time, and at least those Cani had the stones to show up in person. You're not going to enjoy much support from this readership, particularly not with this approach; so do us a favor, yes?

Blow.

[(Anonymous)]

Mmm. You are probably right. Ilottat probably *did* make overtures to find more lovers as well. And I'm sure that Ilottat also lamented missing an opportunity to take advantage of an orren who was in the process of struggling through a bad breakup. And I'd bet that Ilottat surely cheated on our noble Zi Ri at the first opportunity with a baker from Threeze. I'm positive that Ilottat must also have declared that he had made promises to Sythyry without even the slightest intent of following through!

You're right, I'm wrong, and I am terribly sorry for the interruption. My desire to see Ilottat whole and safe was obviously born from misunderstanding of the events that have occurred. I'll go blow now. :)

[sythyry.livejournal.com]

[Maybe not much support from the readership, but the writership doesn't think either Sythyry or Ilottat is behaving particularly well. -bb]

[yotogi.livejournal.com]

My fault entirely; I really ought to know better than to feed the trolls.

Try passive-aggressive tactics.

[ionotter.livejournal.com]

"Why do you always hurt me like this?" Then start to cry.

*sssssSSSTHUNGGG!*

Natural 20, baby. Shot to the heart.

[kris-schnee.livejournal.com]

Cute picture!