(no subject)

[sythyry]

Thieves at Work[15 Oix 4261]

Not a thief

Floosh, of course, spent a great deal of yesterday evening giving me a great deal of excellent relationship advice. I think I heard a lot of it. I definitely heard the name that I've been given -- "I" being my Orren shape, the one who is often seen slinking to and from the Daukrhame embassy, and who nobody really knows any other way.

She's called "Noble Honey."

Floosh recommended that, if I do get back with Ilottat, that I give that Orren shape a real name and such, and go out with Ilottat in public using her more. Make Ilottat treat me like his actual girlfriend. (Well, like his actual mistress, since he's married and all. But who could blame him for having a mistress, since he's married to Ysgwyd.)

The City Guard at Work

I sort of moped back to Across Saga again, looking like Blueshell the Herethroy. Several people there were complaining about the city guards.

Summary	Popularity	Lozens	Approach
Basic Blackmail	moderate	20-50	A guard or two quietly taps the victim on the shoulder, noting that the victim was recently seen in Across Saga, and that the victim might wish this information to stay private.
Fancy Blackmail	moderate	100-400	Two or three guards note that the victim has powerful enemies in the city, and only weak friends. Thestra, who is a thief, has powerful potential enemies -- the foreigners she steals from. She has relatively few local friends -- a typical Cani would have some useful social connections through her family, but Thestra's closest family is Denaist.
Basic Extortion	common	10-60	The guards note that traff-folk have been known to suffer various physical indignities in the neighborhood of late -- perpetrators unknown -- and that the victim might do well to contribute to a private city guard fund concerning such matters.
Basic Robbery	one or two per night	0-500	Two or three invisible people assault the victim, usually with a sword-thrust to the belly followed by a careful pummelling, leaving the victim unconscious. All valuables are removed. Humiliating slogans are attached to the victim or scribbled in the area. The perpetrators are, of course, never caught. A few of these encourage people to be generous when basically extorted.
Protection Money	just one	666	Across Saga pays the guard 666 lozens to avoid having any incidents in the cafe proper on that evening. [Which is to say, 2/3 of 1000 -- no cross-universe numerology at work here. -bb]

I estimate that this extracts some four thousand lozens, or perhaps 166 lozens (after the superiors' and duke's shares) per involved guard. Not bad for a night's moonlighting.

Nobles rarely come to Across Saga, for some reason. We're supposed to be libertines, not traff. Traff is a lowerclass perversion, a pernicious gnawing on one of the roots of Prime civilization. Libertinitude is one of the perquisites of wealth and power.

I'm traff.

Sorry if that sounds like Strenata.

I think I am beginning to understand why she's so displeased with nobility.

Thestra at Work

Thestra and I pleasantried at each other a bit. There's no concealing things from a Cani, though. She asked me what was wrong, and, after a bit of interrogation, I told her.

She offered to go get my clothes from Ilottat.

She got very interested when she learned he's at the Daukrhame embassy. For one thing, he's her legitimate prey, being a non-citizen. For another, that more or less tells her who I am, once she investigates a bit.

Anyways, she excused herself, and in about an hour she came back with one of Ilottat's suitcases.

Me:"I didn't have that many clothes!"

Thestra:"It's not just clothes."

Me:"Oh, dear."

Thestra:"It's his private library, too."

She had packed a suitcase with Ilottat's Zi Ri pornography collection.

That got a big round of applause from all of Across Saga.

Oh, dear.

Comments

[terrycloth.livejournal.com]

...something tells me they won't all assume you're Hezimikkeinen.

[sythyry.livejournal.com]

Nope, they didn't assume any such thing. But, well, we're all traff here, and we all understand why we need to be quiet and careful with real names.

And it's not like anyone can blackmail me. It's easy to find out I'm traff. It's hard to find someone who cares and doesn't know.

[yotogi.livejournal.com]

Ha, this thief has style. I like her.

[sianmink.livejournal.com]

oh my. ^._.^


this is, well, possibly quite a complication!

Noble Honey

[perlandria.livejournal.com]

Just makes me think of Royal Jelly, the queen transformation food of a local nectar insect that makes honey.
You don't want to know where my brain went with that image.

Re: Noble Honey

[gavinfox.livejournal.com]

Hmmm... maybe a better way to say this is, "The phrase 'noble honey' makes me think of something calle "royal jelly". This term comes from a specific food that local tiny insects make. These insects are called 'Honey Bees' and they, of course, make honey from flowers which can then be harvested. You may even have bees similar to ours -- who knows... anyway, when these insects want to turn a normal larva into a queen -- the insect that can give birth to a colony -- they feed it something called 'royal jelly'.

Does your local fauna have anything similar?

Re: Noble Honey

[sythyry.livejournal.com]

When our local insects want to make one of their number a royalty, they apply a special elixir known as "money" to a special prestige-making organelle known as the "legeriat", or, perhaps, to another one known as the "duke". But usually the new noble is too busy to have that many children.

Or is this another one of your incomprehensible political screeds, Gavin?

Re: Noble Honey

[gavinfox.livejournal.com]

I was talking about the natural behavior of nonsentient animals... *sighs*

And I've been trying to lay off of the political and snarky comments. Really, those were rude of me and I'm trying to put that behind me... give a guy a little credit, please?

Re: Noble Honey

[beetiger.livejournal.com]

[Sythyry huffs and slithers off. Zie's feeling a bit cranky, having lost zir love.]

[Bard waves; what you say is true.]

Re: Noble Honey

[terrycloth.livejournal.com]

I'm pretty sure you could say 'bees' and the translator would be able to get the message across.

Re: Noble Honey

[sythyry.livejournal.com]

Bard does!

[chipuni.livejournal.com]

We have a phrase... "If you pay the DaneGeld, you'll never get rid of the Dane." (I'll leave it to Bard to translate the idea of Hamlet over to Sythyry.) And the City Guard now knows that Across Saga is easy prey whenever they want spending money. (Isn't 166 lozens about a month's salary, per guard?)

I think that it's time for Across Saga to shut down -- and to create a new spot for your traff friends -- one with some defenses. (Oh, dear me! That 50-mana creoc pyrador spell was set to go off against anyone who received more that 50 lozens. It must have thought that your guards were robbing us!)

[sythyry.livejournal.com]

Well, they've known it for nine or eighteen years, at least. I just found out, but I'm new here.

And fireblasting city guards is very very not a good idea.

[gavinfox.livejournal.com]

thats what I was thinking...

[jareth-atian.livejournal.com]

As a concerned professional in the field of aquisitions and resource management, I should note that I have in the past performed several cost analysis studies regarding the positives and negatives of fireblasting city guards.

In general, I have determined that fireblasting city guards is very rarely worth the cley. There are simply too many guards present within the city walls and the guards are supported by the wealth and influence of the local nobility. Since the guards get decidedly ill humored when one of their number has been fireblasted, such an action should only be taken as a last resort.

Or, you know, if you're bored or something.

[chipuni.livejournal.com]

Fireblasting city guards is very very not a good idea.

Hrm... You're right. It might hurt the furniture.

A combination of Nowhere Prison and Insects of Agony Consume Your Flesh would be far more appropriate!

A lesson in reverse blackmail

[zeeth_kyrah]

True, getting someone hurt tends to get other people hurt. Teleportation of an embarrassing nature, on the other hand, such as sending all their weapons and body coverings to a barracks across town...

And various gossipy bulletins somehow shortly thereafter getting word that certain guardsmen were seen naked at such a socially inappropriate place...

Shame and nonviolent action against those who try to shame others can drive some to near-impossible heights of rage, but it can be very effective in keeping them from overt action. Especially if someone who happens to have been studying enchantment can provide a bit of security (for a modest fee, of course) against those who attempt to extort through shame and violence.

Just be careful of escalation.

[gavinfox.livejournal.com]

well. defenses against the city guard are a good way to incite the duke's ire. what you have to do is figure out a diplomatic approach... maybe even do something to improve the image of Across Saga, make it a more well-thought-of place to go? or get some important people to enjoy going there? hrmmm...

Yea, or just close and come up with another more secret place to meet...

[terrycloth.livejournal.com]

The problem with coming up with a secret place to meet is that a lot of people have to know the secret, and new people you might want to meet need to be able to find out about it, and neither of those is very good for keeping it secret.

[greenreaper.livejournal.com]

Funnily enough, Sythyry is a mildly important person (or at least, has mildly important relatives) who appears to moderately enjoy going there . . .

[mufi.livejournal.com]

There can be no problem!

The Illotat, he does not wish to be called traff; the porn, it is of Zi Ri.

To take it from him is a parting gift, to save him from cases of mistaken identity.

[rowyn]

Absolutely! Very thoughtful of Thestra, really, to observe that this collection obviously did not belong in the hands of one such as Illotat.

[tuftears.livejournal.com]

Finestkind thinking!

[yotogi.livejournal.com]

This thinking, it is the genius!

[mazlynn.livejournal.com]

*applause*

[terrycloth.livejournal.com]

And I'm sure that for a small fee, Thestra can dispose of it safely, so that it doesn't accidentally find its way into the wrong hands.

[sythyry.livejournal.com]

Yeah -- I don't know what I'd do with it. I'm traff, I don't want Zi Ri porn.

[redbird]

Offer it to a fine-looking Orren and see if it incites him or her into suitable wild rushing?

[justicezero.livejournal.com]

Just because you are traff does not mean you do not also appreciate Zi Ri. The two are not necessarily exclusive. You had noted earlier that you found those books interesting in the past.
The nearest equivalent of traff-ness here is an appreciation for the same gender. There are many people who are attracted to both.

[sythyry.livejournal.com]

[Sythyry does not deign to reply. Zie's gotten all political about this topic. -bb]

[sebkha.livejournal.com]

This combination of friends in high and low places will someday have spectacular consequences.