(no subject)

[sythyry]

Piffish Noodles and Pain [18 Chirreb 4261]

I duly delivered the piffish noodles to Vae, along with the paper that she requested. (She is going to write a story, with prime characters, sort of along the lines of the childrens' stories I've been selling her. She wanted to write it on prime paper, therefore. (I think she's fishing for good things to get from Vheshrame -- the fact that she generically craves prime things doesn't mean she wants anything in particular. Or anything sensible.) I promised her I'd read it. I'm sure I'll be able to find something polite to say.)

That is not true of all her artistry.

Vae:"There's a little present I made for Real-Eel, like. Since I can't send the Vingi of hers off to the wherever of his."

Me:"Well, that's nice and polite of you. Nothing that would get her in trouble with the Duke, I hope?"

Vae:"No, just a mouse."

Me:"Well, I daresay the ducal taxes on mice aren't so large. May I see this famous mouse?"

Vae:"Oh, my surely!" I am annoyed with her, so I am translating her a bit more literally than I sometimes do. She was speaking the Nice Language, which she often does to me. I don't generally speak it back to her.

I am annoyed with her because it wasn't a very pleasant mouse to look at. It was an even less pleasant mouse to be, I think. It was trapped in a little bubble of braided places, so it could run for yards and yards, without ever leaving the palm of your hand. It was being chased by little fire wasps. Every once in a while, a tiny rabbit-goblin would appear and ram a tiny Locador-composed needle through its paw, and then heal it with a really nasty jagged Mutoc healing spell.

Me:"Um ... Vae? What is this about?"

Vae:"Oh, nothing but a model is it, but it's neat and appealing. The thought's on me that Real-Eel would like it."

Me:"I can't think why. She's not wholly horrid."

(I just realized that I called Vaisessasilmin wholly horrid, which probably isn't wise. Either she didn't notice, or she didn't want to argue the point. (Yes, she is wholly horrid, but at least she doesn't take offense at me very easily.))

Vae:"I hope she likes it."

Me:"I suppose we can give it to the Sleeth." Then something wholly horrid occurred to me. As I get more used to Vae I should start to realize these things earlier. "What's it a model for?"

Vae:"Oh, it's some Gormoror assassins from Psent who need their punishing. It's bone insects painted green they are until I decide what to do with them.... Is there a good idea with you, Sythyry?"

Oh, dearie.

[Poll #551629]

Comments

[goodluckfox.livejournal.com]

Well, on the one hand, it looks like self-defense to me. She's not KILLING them after all, and she could, so she's actually being pretty humane. Everybody lives, and she gets to be in peace.

The Duke should be informed, however, just in case. Foreign nationals getting themselves captured/held in Vheshhrame Mene may be of some concern to him... the political ramifications thereof.

Loxley

[sythyry.livejournal.com]

Well, um ... I'd rather be killed quickly than be tortured by a nendrai, even an amateur one. I think most people would agree.

And of course the Duke or at least the city guard hears about everything about Vae. I write reports. Probably they're scrying, or at least watching somehow -- I wasn't lying to Real-Eel.

I rather wish I felt confident enough or well-enough versed in what was going on to be able to lie to someone. Yylhauntra, maybe.

[terrycloth.livejournal.com]

Does she intend her tortures to be permanent?

Maybe you could suggest that she do something mouseish to them, then trade them to Veshrame for trinkets, which would humiliate them further. Then the duke could decide whether their continuing punishment was necessary, and she wouldn't have to know either way.

[collie13.livejournal.com]

Point out to her that the Gormorer should be turned back into Gormorer now, because surely they will be very grateful to her for doing so, and then they might bring her gifts? In fact, why not do that right now, so you can explain the situation to the Gormorer, so they'll know what sorts of gifts she'd like?

[pyat.livejournal.com]

They should be left as mice, and sold as pets!

[melskunk.livejournal.com]

This is extremely horrid! I think someone needs to explain to her that torture is not, not, NOT a good idea. At all.

[rowyn]

I'm with you.

I think she ought to let that poor mouse go, too. O_o

[oliver-otter.livejournal.com]

Well, I'd say if they were trying to kill her (maybe it's worth asking how she knew for sure they were, just in case), but assuming they were trying to kill her, they've pretty well gotten what they were asking for. I'd say compliment her on her creativity thus far, and politely remark that she's the true expert on these things, and you wouldn't presume to offer inferior suggestions. Maybe drop a small hint that if the punishment weren't permanent, they'd learn a lesson and be able to communicate it better to their countryfolk.

[sythyry.livejournal.com]

She said something about enchanted crossbow bolts and heavy, heavy fire spells. I just checked, and the Eye agrees.

[sythyry.livejournal.com]

Forgive me, but I daresay few, if any, primes would be unfamiliar with the lesson, avoid nendrai at all costs.

[brennabat.livejournal.com]

The nendrai answer: Teleport the model in to a upside down position and shake it vigorously, then propose an idea that you feel is more creatively twisted in an effort to prove your nendrai superiority.

The prime answer: Urge her to let them go (because they're Primes) and in to the hands of the Duke. Hopefully Vae will learn to depend on the Duke for her justice, the Primes will receive a reasonable Prime punishment by and you can feel pleased you saved some Primes while passing the responsibility buck.

The something else answer: Pazi Pazi would love the model -- it would help its plans for world-spanning evil.

The strange unrelated commentary: It's good that LiveJournal doesn't automatically correct spelling. Pazi Pazi would have ended up Nazi Nazi according to the sites replacement list.

[tuftears.livejournal.com]

Since you asked for something else: have Vae convert the Gormorors into her bodyguards, or otherwise guards of her home. As trained assassins (one presumes that Psent would not send amateur assassins) they should have some good ideas about security.

You may want to assure Vae that Real-Eel might appreciate the mouse-model better if it did not involve the mouse being harmed.

[terrycloth.livejournal.com]

So, would it be better to have your mind changed by a nendrai than to be tortured by one?

[tuftears.livejournal.com]

From a practical standpoint, it is a lot more convenient and useful! Sythyry probably also does not want Vae to consider torture to be a reasonable means of entertainment.

[jareth-atian.livejournal.com]

I would make every effort to convince Vaisessasilmin that Primes consider nothing so cruel and intimidating as largesse. Gentle condescension and mockery would surely have the powers in Psent quivering!

Well...Maybe a *little* bit of torture would be all right. Vae isn't a prime, of course, so it's not really murder...still, it's terribly rude of Psent to send Adventurers into your territory to kill off the local fauna. Poaching is a serious crime!

A few weeks spent trapped within twists of space and time would surely teach those gormoror miscreants a lesson.