(no subject)

[sythyry]

Uncharacteristic [12 Trandary 4262]

No, this isn't at all how I usually do things...

Ysgwyd:"Well, that didn't work."

Me:"Ilottat could not perform?"

Ysgwyd:"He did pretty well with a hired fake Zi Ri sitting on his face. I'm inconcievable though."

Me:"You're what?"

Delframber:"Not pregnant."

Me:"Oh, right. You didn't concieve."

Ysgwyd:"So we're going to have to try again."

Me:"OK..."

Ysgwyd:"So we're going to need another spell. So I have that chance to stop being so agravidical."

Me:"So what?"

Delframber:"So not pregnant."

Me:"That's not a real word!"

Ysgwyd:"My grasp on reality is not so strong! Never underestimate the wildness of an Orren who is trying to stop being so fitzy-gritzy!"

Me:[with an air of inevitability]"So what?"

Delframber:"So not pregnant."

Me:"I have never heard that word before."

Delframber:"I don't think anyone has. But there's only one thing it could mean."

Me:"Right-o. Another spell. There will be a price."

Ysgwyd:"Anything! Short of my first-born. That would sort of defeat the point of my current reproductive frenzy!"

Me:"What?"

Delframber:"She said, getting pregnant."

Me:"I thought so. Wasn't she supposed to mean 'not pregnant' though?"

Ysgwyd:"I forgot, OK?"

Delframber:"Pregnancy, my dear, Does Things to the mind."

Ysgwyd:"Working on it!"

Me:"Anyways, I have lost my latest traff Orren. I want a replacement!"

Ysgwyd:"Huh?"

Me:(explains)

Ysgwyd:"Awwww, poor Sythyry. That pink-tipped bitch!"

Me:"Black-handed, actually."

Ysgwyd:"Huh?"

Me:(explains)

Ysgwyd:"Right. Anyways, give me that spell, please, and I'll be on my way."

Me:"Hey! I said there'd be a price this time."

Ysgwyd:"A what?"

Delframber:"Pregnant, dear. Pregnant."

Me and Ysgwyd:"Wrong!"

Delframber:"Sorry. Bad habit."

Ysgwyd:"What price."

Me:"A traff Orren."

Ysgwyd:"How long?"

Me:"About six feet or so from toes to top of head."

Ysgwyd:"That's not what I meant!"

Me:"Um ... I'm not too fussy about which gender the Orren is, so there mightn't even be that length measurement."

Ysgwyd:"That's not what I meant either! Are we talking about a squirmy hour in an afternoon, or getting married, or what?"

Me:"Um ... "

Ysgwyd:"Ah, what the heck." She started to strip. "Can Delframber watch?"

Me:"I meant, um, could you introduce me to some traff Orrens?"

Ysgwyd:"Not in Vheshrame these days. I haven't lived here recently, and don't know who's doing what to who at all. So d'you want the hour or not?"

[Poll #960950]

Comments

[terrycloth.livejournal.com]

*peers at Sythyry's answers*

Wow, really? I guess it does get less scary after you've done it a few times... er... well, not really all that few, huh?

Did Delframber watch?

[sythyry.livejournal.com]

Those answers are from my translator, so that we can see the quiz easily.

[tuftears.livejournal.com]

Well, Sythyry should have been more specific about what /kind/ of traff Orren zie wanted! But now I am curious, what /kind/ of traff Orren does Sythyry want, ideally? I mean, I should think that not just any Orren will do.

[sythyry.livejournal.com]

Student, relatively sober by Orren standards, unashamed, happy.

[tuftears.livejournal.com]

Physical appearance? For life or for a fling? Preferred to have common interests/avocation or to be different from Sythyry in interests and temperament?

[sythyry.livejournal.com]

I would definitely prefer someone with a physical appearance!

I don't think that I get the "life" choice, alas.

Common interests adn temperament would be nice.

[terrycloth.livejournal.com]

Aww. How are we going to tell if we got the right answers, then?

[gavinfox.livejournal.com]

well what sort of physical apperance are you looking for? and for the duration of *their* life, obviously! Would you want someone to be with for the duration of your university term or longer? Like how do you feel about dating an Orren nearing their end of life expectancy?

[gavinfox.livejournal.com]

also, how expensive are the magics that make a normal mortal have a limitless natural lifespan? Like how rich would one have to be to have those done?

[vernononfm.livejournal.com]

Alas! I am neither a student any longer, nor still in Vheshrame. Pity there aren't any ZiRi around my city. At least, none that bother coming by my shop! Hmm.. All this makes me think I should try making a 'traff detector'. Oh! I know just the combination of arts that would let me avoid Mentador, too! *runs off to get working on his plans*

[terrycloth.livejournal.com]

It seems like the cheapest traff detector would be a cani. Traff cani must have it easy!

[(Anonymous)]

Yes, this would be quite true. The thing is, if I was dragging a traff cani around all the time, well.. Ahem. Honestly, if I had a traff cani, I wouldn't be leaving my home very often, now would I? :P

[vernononfm.livejournal.com]

That was me. Didn't realize my name wasn't recognized this time I tried responding!

[chipuni.livejournal.com]

This message is for Bard, not Sythyry.

I'd be surprised if Sythyry would accept her offer.

Sythyry seems to want a relationship far more than a quick bed. It's had the opportunity to have cheap sex in the past, but turned the opportunity down. (Actually, IIRC, it flew away rather horrified.)

[sythyry.livejournal.com]

Yeah, but zie was a virgin at the time -- now zie's not, and zie's been hanging around in traff bars a bunch. Also, zie's got a relationship with Yswyd: it'd be sympathy sex / friends with benefits kind of thing, which that party wasn;t.

[esory.livejournal.com]

I can't imagine you could be *that* desperate. O_O

[sythyry.livejournal.com]

You can't? Willing Orren? Willing traff Orren? Single Sythyry? Single mopey Sythyry?

I might have done, and I might not have done, but it wasn't a foregone conclusion to me!

[esory.livejournal.com]

Clearly, I do not have a sufficiently broad imagination.

O_O

On the other hand, not having a sufficiently board imagination may be just as well in this case.

I'm not gonna ask if you would let Delframber watch.

[sythyry.livejournal.com]

Or simply a sufficiently broad experience. I can't remember you ever being particularly distraught when someone broke up with you. You seem to give your heart quite carefully, which is a lesson I should try to learn from you. My teachers have all been Orren, though.

Besides, Ysgwyd is tolerably rich and well-connected and shapely. One could bring her to court and not raise an eyebrow. Yes, she is married, but I've cuckolded her quite thoroughly, so I suppose she should be allowed a turn with me on those grounds if she wanted.

Well, I mean, one could bring her to court if one put a muzzle on her. An invisible one. Never mind that.

But it's not as if she's painted with any tar that I don't have a few drops of on my feathers already.

[esory.livejournal.com]

You seem to give your heart quite carefully, which is a lesson I should try to learn from you.

*stares at Sythyry*

*smacks her forehead*

I never can tell whether you're astonishingly obtuse, Sythyry, or just terminally polite.

...

And I guess Ysgwyd is sort of attractive, in some ways. I mean, you'd never have to worry about *her* being ashamed to be seen with you. You being ashamed to be seen with her, maybe, but not the other way 'round. And you'd never have to wonder if she was concealing anything from you because she's honest to a fault. To an enormous, scary, treequake-fashioned, fault.

All things considered, though, I think I'd rather sleep with Delframber

[sythyry.livejournal.com]

I never can tell whether you're astonishingly obtuse, Sythyry, or just terminally polite.

Well, I am an official Vheshrame ambassador.

So, let's go for "astonishingly obtuse". If I wasn't so dumb, I'd've found a way to stop being an official Vheshrame ambassador already.

But I didn't think you particularly liked Orren any-the-ways. I'd sort of guessed Cani or something.

[esory.livejournal.com]

You're certainly not *stupid*. Oblivious, yes, I can buy that. Dumb, no.

But I didn't think you particularly liked Orren any-the-ways. I'd sort of guessed Cani or something.

...

Well, you're half right.

[sythyry.livejournal.com]

Well, you're half right.

Better than most day, then!

*hmph*

[esory.livejournal.com]

*relents a bit*

I'm not especially interested in Cani or Orren. Or Herethroy. Nothing wrong with them. Or Rassimel, either, for that matter. Maybe I just haven't met the right one yet.

[sythyry.livejournal.com]

[Sythyry looks at that list of species, and at ...I'd rather sleep with Delframber., and comes to a conclusion which completely explains Esory's lack of visible relationships and touchiness and secrecy on the general topic. It may not be the answer Esory is hinting at, though.]

"Oh, heavens. I'm sorry ... I am obtuse."

[Sythyry offers Esory a hug: apologetic and sympathetic, but not a bit romantic.]